Now I have worked out I can just post about this, that and the cat I feel less afraid. I can just come here write stuff, hit publish and off I go again. I knew this already really but I have a tendency to self limiting behaviours.
Anyone who has been hanging around here for a while will know, I have quite a few self-limiting behaviours, I use this termininology because my sister is a hypnotherapist. She taught me the phrase. I like it. Although I don't much like the self-limiting behaviours. Me being me I can't remember the whole conversation but I just thought I had lots of phobias. No I am not neurotic honestly I am not, in fact I am pretty level headed. This comes from having had a very very misspent youth. The only thing is I am not very conventional. I sometimes look at other women my age and think, is that what I am supposed to wear?
Anyway back to self-limiting behaviours, which I just used to call phobias. This is the bit of the conversation I cannot remember. Although it may have gone like this. If you are afraid of spiders for example, that is a phobia. A simple phobia. But if like me you have a driving phobia that is a self-limiting behaviour not a simple phobia. Please feel free to correct me. I will drive. But I am very very specific about the whys and the wherefores.
I will drive locally, but only on back roads. I won't drive on dual carriageways, motorways, large roundabouts. I no longer care what people think about this I spent too many years worrying about that. My sister thinks lots of small things related to being in cars and stuff happening and a couple of very big things that happened in cars have contributed to my self-limiting behaviours.
One day I may feel up to explaining the big thing that happened in the car but right now I don't feel compelled to do so. Perhaps mentioning 'The Big Thing' here, which for me is a big thing in itself may help me to overcome this self limiting behaviour?
Now if this were me reading this I would be thinking - so if your sister is a hypnotherapist surely she could just hypnotize you out of your 'phobias. I write phobias because frankly continually typing self limiting behaviours is tiresome. The thing is despite the fact that she is a successful hynotherapist. (I would really appreciate it if you have read this post and just want to comment I think all that hypnotherapy stuff is a load of shite, because actually I will take it personally, I don't mind anyone having a pop at me but to my kith and kin, be very very aware I go crazy. I am a Leo and Leo's are profoundly protective of their loved one's) Anyhow back on topic. Because she is my sister when she has tried to hynotize me it just does not work. Because I can't stop laughing. She is my older sister and as such has always bossed me about. Somewhere in the back of my mind the minute she tries I just rebel and laugh and laugh and laugh.
So she gets really annoyed and I still can't stop laughing. I cannot afford to see another hypnotherapist and so am left with my 'self limiting behaviour'.
On the whole my driving phobia has little impact on my life. I potter about in places that are familiar and if we need to go further afield OH drives. Daughter and son drive also now so when I can stop bossing them about and telling what to do in the car I am sure they will drive me further afield. Son has devised a very good coping tactic for when we approach large roundabouts, he insists I wear a hat and says 'mum, time to pull your hat over your eyes'. So if you ever see a very short, dark haired woman in a car sat beside an exasperated good looking 18year old male with her hat pulled over her eyes it will be me. You can say to your OH 'hey I have just seen Achelois from The Tensile Times!'
nb - It is actual fact that Ehlers Danlos Syndrome shares the same gene as the phobia gene. So there you go, aren't I lucky. I think I got that fact right but google it for proper citation.
So thats me and my self limiting behaviour. There are more but I rather feel that is enough to be going on with.
